I don’t know, but eventually, I got tired of writing, of telling stories through this blog, but I’m still trying ‘cos at least, this keeps me sane. Y’know, when you have everything and anything inside your chest, all you just want to have is some way out, but nope, I am fine -- I am pretty fine.

Nothing great is actually happening in my life. Days are same old, same old, but last week, my cousin went home from abroad and she decided to treat us for a night out, so on a Friday afternoon, I went out from work earlier than I should, then got ready for a 2-3-hour drive to the neighboring city. We then headed in some place for dinner.

Then after that, we looked for a hotel to stay in just for a night. It was actually a bit crazy because the hotels were fully-booked and then pinagpasa-pasahan pa kami ng dalawang hotel. I mean, when we entered this Hotel 1, the front desk assistant told us that there’s no more available room for our number, so he referred us to another, and so we rode a taxi and headed to Hotel 2. When we arrived in there, there’s no more available room (again), but the front desk assistant made a phone call and told us to go to Hotel 1 because there’s an available room for us there. And we were like, “What???? We just came from there and the man told us that there’s no available room for us and referred us here. Pinaglalaruan niyo ba kami?” But of course, we didn’t blurt out the last sentence and we tried to be nice as much as we could, although we were all pissed and already tired then.

So the front desk assistant of Hotel 2 referred us back to Hotel 1, but we asked him to confirm it again, then we thanked him and left. But instead of going to Hotel 1, we opted to just look for some hotel nearby but to no avail. So okay, we rode back to Hotel 1, and we were trying our best to be nice kay Kuyang  nasa front desk, and when he was finally booking us a room, nagmakaawa siya na huwag kaming mag-ingay. So was he cautious about us making some noise inside the hotel that’s why he had to make some white lies in the first place? Wow, Kuya. Tingin niya siguro sa’min, mga estudyante pa lang eh.

So okay, we went up to our room, rest for a while then took a bath. It was already past 12am when we all decided to go down and roam around the place a little. Then we went inside a bar -- yep, your soft girl is nagpapapaka bad girl na. Hahaha just kiddin’. This is my second time around (the first was when I passed the boards, still with my cousins, kasi nga gusto daw nila akong binyagan haha).

Anyway, the guys had some entrance fee, while it was free for the girls, and I am never a fan of the lights inside, because ugh, sakit sa mata. Then they started to order some drinks and some food to munch. And while everybody was dancing their nerves away, andun ako, patingin-tingin lang sa paligid, steady lang sa kinatatayuan until we had the chance to grab some chairs para maupo naman. Lol. They made me try a beer, so I did, but my taste buds didn’t like it, but my cousins were still insisting. So para naman hindi ako KJ, I poured some in my cup and did the trick (kunwari iniinom ko, pero hnd talaga, hanggang bibig lang). Lol. I'm sorry, cousisns. Hahaha.



When it was almost 2am, nag countdown na yung DJ. I think there’s some new ordinance na hanggang 2am na lang yung mga inuman place. And when the clock finally struck 2am, the place became all well-lit, after a few minutes, we went down, bought some street food and chips then stayed for a while in a convenience store. They were all tipsy, except me. Inaasar pa ako na ever since, most well-behaved talaga ako. Haha

After that, we went back to the hotel, washed our faces, changed our clothes, and slept. We all agreed to wake up by 8am, but what could we expect??? They all slept until 11am while I was already up by 7:30am. I took a bath, got myself ready, naki-wifi and took some selfies while waiting for them to be up.

CPA Review Days -- that was one of the most stressful period of my life.

I’ve never been too emotional in my entire life until I hopped into review school. I was very sensitive. I am crying most of the time and I felt like giving up a couple of times. Even reached the point where I questioned myself of why I chose this path.

And I almost backed out the night before the board exam. After all those restless days and stressful nights, I still felt like I wasn’t so ready, like feeling ko, wala na akong natandaan sa mga pinag-aralan ko.

I messaged my mentors hoping to receive some words from them that could at least push me to keep going. Hello? Ilang tumbling na lang ako ‘til the finish line, tas gi-give up lang?

But that was honestly what I felt. I doubted myself. I was too afraid to disappoint everyone. “My family invested so much in me. I’ve performed quite well during my undergrad. So people are expecting for me to pass it all at once. Pero paano kung hindi ko ‘to maipasa? I will disappoint a lot of people. I will disappoint even myself. Wala akong mukhang maihaharap sa kahit kanino kung ganun.” Yep, those were my words then. I know they weren’t healthy, but hindi ko na talaga naiwasan na mag-isip ng ganun. There were many days that I stayed so long in the shower. Crying. Listening to worship songs to at least make me feel better.

Even a few days before the board exam, I was not anymore able to focus well. I am opening my reviewers, reading, but I wasn’t able to absorb anything. Lumilipad utak ko. Dami kong naiisip.

Here's a tip: Huwag nang umasa na you could still study a week before the board exam. If kaya naman, finish everything before that para scan-scan ka na lang thereafter.

But despite everything, I saw my name from the list of the October 2017 CPA Board Exam Passers and it was the most surreal moment of my life yet.


It just feels good to reminisce those days of my life. I can’t believe, nalagpasan ko na.

To those CPA aspirants out there, laban lang. Sooner, you’ll reach that point in your life where magbabalik-tanaw ka na lang sa mga hirap na pinagdaanan mo & you could finally release a sigh of relief because you’ve already done it. Nasa iyo na ang titulo. Kaya wag kang sumuko. Pahinga lang ng konti, tapos laban ulit. :)