embracing changes this august

Tuesday, October 01, 2019 Philippines


and here i am, wrapping up august when it's already october. i'm as extra as that. lol. anyway, i’m happy about august. it’s the month where i started to be a little more mindful again. i started to write more in my journal, i watched movies that i love, i bought a few stuff that i need and kind of stopped myself from buying those that i only want, and at some point, shed a couple of tears over something that i find really petty now. there are stuff that i learned about myself and it’s one of those months when i started to love myself a little more.

and here’s more from august:

we changed our payroll system at work after a sudden transformation and i had to wait for my salary for a couple of weeks and that’s when i had to do some tweaks in my budget, but everything is all good and rolling now.

with that said, i had to go to the bank to open another account. if you know me, i loathe going to the banks, public offices and whatnot. i just don’t like dealing with the attendants there because at most times, i find them not accommodating as they’re supposed to be. as much as possible, i really avoid tasks like this, but well… i really could not get away from it, so okay. i just have to.


we went to a river tour with the whole family days before my uncle left for abroad again. it was really fun and very relaxing plus i am with my favorite persons. i felt whole despite the void that i was feeling that time.


i watched a filipino movie with mom, grandma, and my cousin. i love it! i cried many times. i never had a boyfriend yet nor do i have anyone to call “special” as of the moment neither before, but i feel like i am already at this point in my life where maturity in a relationship is such a big factor. let’s face it, we are not getting any younger. playing games is not an option anymore. it’s already a matter of now and the future, and i think we all deserve someone who is selfless enough to understand and support us with our ventures as an individual, especially if it’s something that could help us grow.


i tried a japanese restaurant (which i now forgot the name lol) with mom and my brother and dang boyyyy, i am not going back. i mean, my taste buds just didn’t enjoy the food i had, not even a bit, probably because i am not really used to those japanese cuisine and it was too expensive. it’s not that bad for an experience, though.

photo credits to tinene brotarlo

i grabbed my holiday off (national heroes' day) and took it as an opportunity to go back to my alma mater and celebrate with the first day of its founding anniversary. i again saw some of my college friends and met some of the current accountancy students as i had to hand something over to them. i came to enjoy the battle of the bands. there's something about amateur performances that i love. there were already a few changes in the campus since the last time i was there and there were pretty much a lot of people visiting the booths and watching the events, and i extremely felt nostalgic. college was one of the best days of my life, and if only i can go back, i definitely would!


it was also in august when mom started having her sundays off from work and i am definitely the happiest. if you don’t know yet, my mom used to be very busy with work (she still is), that she almost works 24/7. we’d even always argue about her not having some time for us, that she’s already making her work her priority rather than us. i had so many dramas in life about that, but things are starting to work for the better now and mom cooks for us every sunday. also, i’m trying to learn cooking from her. it’s not that easy and i don’t have that much patience for it, but i’m trying to love and enjoy it the way mom does.

and i think that’s pretty much it for august.

and oh, before i end this i would like to share some lines by anthony, played by jm de guzman, from the filipino movie, that thing called tadhana:

alam mo kasi ang pagmamahal na ganyan, love na pinapakita mo kung gaano ka ka overwhelming parang imposibleng walang puntahan. mababalik at mababalik yan sayo, not necessarily sa taong pinagbibigyan mo, pero sigurado ako, babalik sayo yan. tulad nga ng sabi ni john lloyd, "kaya tayo iniiwan ng mga taong mahal natin kasi may paparating na bago. magmamahal satin, magpaparealize satin kung bakit naging mali yung dati. magpaparealize din satin kung paano tayo dapat mahalin.

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sincerely,
riz

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